What makes us hold on to things, people and events? Why do we collect them, keep them and don't let them go???Why? Is it fear? or habit? or attachment? And once we decide to let them go, why does it hurt so much?
I believe it is our ego which is the origin of fear, attachment and suffering. We attach ourselves to things and people willingly. Because our spirits are free...Free of attachment, free of fear, free of suffering. So holding on is not spirit based. We create realities in our minds and try to fit the realities of others into ours in a way that sometimes it is so destructive for everyone involved. At the end, everyone and everything is broken; hearts, homes, children, furniture, finances, hopes and dreams. All broken...
We hold on to events as well, like toddlers hold onto their lollipops. So tight, so strongly that past is always on our way to stop us in our tracks. We are so dumbstruck about things happened may be years ago that we can't even allow ourselves to enjoy today and now. We bicker, fuss, argue about things happened so long ago to ruin our present.
How about holding on to objects??? That one does not even make sense because objects can't give back human emotion. They can't love you back, hug you back, kiss you back. They can't support you or be friends with you. At least with people, we can expect to be loved back so there is an emotional dimension to holding on to friends, spouses or lovers, but to objects??? Let them go!!! Just let them go!!!
Holding on is so difficult and arduous that at the end, we are exhausted, disappointed and resigned. We develop so much resentment, guilt and anger towards ourselves and towards people we are trying to hold on that at the end letting go is blasphemous! We hurt ourselves and we hurt them. We break apart. We are undone!
So what is the way to go??? I don't have the answers, but for me I've learned not to attach myself to anything and anyone. I've learned not to press upon my expectations on people and events. I've learned to let them be, and let myself be!!! Free!!! Free of fear of losing, fear of loving, fear of guilt and suffering. I've learned that suffering is in my head!!! I've learned not to label events as good or bad, just events happening as they should be. This was not an easy learning, but we are all capable. Take the ego out of the way and you are free, just like a bird! Ready to fly to your next destination without dragging your emotions! Take the ego out of the way! it is not easy, but possible!!! Let go! Let people go! Let the past go! Let the objects go! Just let go! Like Dr.Martin Luther King said "Free at last, free at last, free at last..."
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